Failure on the First: Chocolate Fudge Cake

Chocolate fudge cake failure

I know what you’re thinking – how can anything involving the words ‘CHOCOLATE FUDGE CAKE’ be a failure. Well… me… that’s how.

This tale starts off with a planned trip to visit some friends one weekend, and during the week before I turn to Mr P and say ‘Hmmm, if I have time, I might make a chocolate fudge cake to take with us this weekend’ … wait no, let me write that correctly… “Hmmm, if I have time, I might make a chocolate fudge cake to take with us this weekend” which resulted in him telling said friends that I was making a cake… he’s a crafty so’n’so… ensuring he gets his cake that way!

So, anyway, I make the chocolate fudge cake the night before… I know you’re all dying to know, so here’s the recipe (hailed as magic chocolate fudge cake, because it contains no dairy and no eggs)

10 oz SR flour (less 1 tablespoon)
6 oz caster sugar
1 tbs cocoa powder

The chocolate fudge icing is really the crème-de-la-crème of this recipe (please note, not crème-de-la-crème-de-la-edgar! I AM NOT TRYING TO DROWN MY FRIENDS… also, kudos if anyone actually gets that reference), it’s even better, because there are NO QUANTITES, which means you must do it by taste, which means LOTS OF TASTING CHOCOLATE FUDGE SAUCE and invariably burning oneself on it… but oh well.

Melt an equal quantity of dairy free margarine and golden syrup together until the mixture is smooth – to taste, add cocoa powder and icing sugar (I know this is called something different in America, but I can’t recall what it is) until the mixture tastes goooooooood. WARNING, this will solidify really quickly, it will also not look elegant on your cake as it splooges everwhere and then turns into gooey fudge… but it tastes so good it doesn’t matter.

“Where’s the failure” I hear you all cry… well, it’s coming… So, I made said, inelegant, but tasty looking cake – got home from work, and removed cake from the fridge in order to take it with me. We got half an hour down the road to our friends (a 4 hour drive away… this is a long way in England) and I realised THE CAKE WAS STILL SAT AT HOME… WHAT A FAILURE.

Actually, I decided that I wanted the cake so much (and so did everyone else) that the next day, I made cake AT MY FRIENDS HOUSE. It was like friendship cake. Chocolaty fudgey friendship cake.

Which also meant that Mr P and I had a second cake to eat when we got home.

Wait… why was this a failure again?

Lesson learnt: Don’t tell Mr P about plans until they are definite… he will share them with the world just to get cake.